Men are far more likely than women—to fall in love at first sight—48 percent vs. 28 percent. Also, 33 percent more men (as compared to women) around the world claim that it bothers them immensely that their partner isn’t romantic enough. If you find these statistics related to marriage surprising or even alarming, here’s some news for you:
“Marriage is not a bed of roses.”
Sounds too cliché and stereotypical in today’s day and age? But guess what. Some things do not change because they were never meant to. The above adage is more relevant now than it has ever been because relationships and in particular marriages are replete with predicaments and impediments that are bound to make you question the longevity of your relationship.
Thankfully, not all is doom and gloom and there are warning signs (red flags, if you well) that are relatively easy to spot and even rectify. By avoiding these avoidable challenges, you stand a pretty good chance of making your marriage work.
So let’s delve straight into each of these challenges and their nuances.
Infidelity
This is a no-brainer and an absolute deal-breaker in any relationship, as it should be. Most couples across the world claim that infidelity is the biggest hurdle that keeps them from saving their relationship. This challenge jeopardizes the very foundation of a relationship: trust and love.
Contrary to popular belief, infidelity is not a gender-specific trait and both men and women are known for their proclivity to cheat. Having said that, nearly every study on extramarital affairs shows that men are more likely to commit adultery than women.
Sexual incompatibility
The topic of sexual compatibility or the lack thereof is another potential problem area in a relationship. In several cases, it is observed that partners are unable to determine what would satiate their sexual needs or expectations, thus leading to disappointments or unaddressed concerns.
No matter what one says, sexual satisfaction is one of the most important areas that help keep a relationship intact. For this reason, when your partner does not enjoy a particular move in the bed even if you’re game for it, don’t rush into it and take your time discussing that takes into account your partner’s comfort level as well.
These seemingly small issues, when left unaddressed, snowball into a major disagreement in no time, so take care.
Money Management
If someone tells you that money and/or financial management is as important as sexual compatibility in sustaining a relationship, chances are that you may not entirely agree. But as always, there is more than what meets the eye.
Couples who live in the same apartment commonly bicker about who will pay the bill under what setting, which sometimes escalates into a big fight.
‘Shared responsibilities’ sounds like a good plan but it takes two to tango, so sit down with your partner, have an honest discussion about it, and specify your respective goals in life so that they can be aligned.
You both may not share the same priorities in life, but you can certainly take responsibility for financial management concerning managing money in a mutually acceptable manner.
Differences in Values/Culture
When two individuals begin dating each other, it is only natural for them to bring plenty of cultural and belief system differences owing to the way they have been raised. Do not be surprised to know that the culture, beliefs, and values you hold precious are not treated as seriously by your partner.
For example, your partner may be interested in one specific place of worship and believe in sharing as a value, while you may be irreligious or even an atheist. This is because his/her social conditioning is likely to have been much different from yours. Unless you find a way to cope and co-exist with these, problems will prevail.
Stress
Stress is not only one of the leading causes of death in many parts of the world, it also damages relationships in pretty serious ways. The cause of stress could be manifold: family issues, illness, failure to achieve desired goals, professional challenges, etc.
Stress is insidiously hazardous because it will deny couples the opportunity to mutually enjoy love and romance. It typically affects one partner more than other and can take more serious forms such as depression, divorce, or even suicide.
Trying to change one another
Changing one another is a way of buying conformity and will mostly lead to problems among modern couples. Romantic partners are more often than not trying to change one another.
For instance, one person may want their partner to start watching a particular movie or reading a particular kind of book in which he/she may be uninterested in. Such inflicted changes might find a hard heart, resulting in unending problems.
Forcing them to watch movies or TV shows of your choice is another example that meets with revulsion. Not a good idea at all! The key lies in approaching their uniqueness and focusing on the qualities that attracted you to them in the first place. Summing up, there are countless problems modern couples will always face, but the idea is to find ways of solving or at least managing them. Every couple should develop ways of solving these problems while love remains the constant factor.
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